7 Effective Exercises to Manage Your Child’s Anger

7 Effective Exercises to Manage Your Child’s Anger


Emotions are a natural part of being human. They are our brain’s way of responding to various stimuli and experiences. For children, emotions can be particularly overwhelming because their brains are still developing the ability to regulate these powerful feelings. Anger, for example, can arise from frustration, unmet needs, or even simple misunderstandings. Understanding the origins of these emotions can help us as parents guide our children through their emotional storms.

Recognizing emotions is the first step toward managing them. Children often struggle to identify what they are feeling, which can lead to outbursts of anger. Teaching children to recognize their emotions and express them in a healthy way is crucial. Emotions can be expressed through words, drawings, or even physical activities. Helping children find appropriate outlets for their emotions can make a significant difference in their behavior and emotional health.

A great way to help children understand their emotions is by using the movie “Inside Out” . In the movie, different emotions like Joy, Sadness, Anger, Fear, and Disgust are personified as characters living inside a little girl’s mind. This visual representation can help children better understand their own emotions and how they influence behavior. Additionally, using “Positive Discipline’s Feeling Faces Chart “, children can identify and label their emotions, making it easier for them to communicate how they feel.

Every family has a “little volcano” or two, ready to erupt at any moment, causing tension at home. As a mom, I understand the challenges of managing a child’s angry outbursts. My son, little Ming, is a perfect example. However, through a series of psychological self-help exercises combined with insights from brain science and positive discipline, I’ve found ways to turn his anger into laughter and understanding. Here are some exercises Ming and I have done together, and I hope they can help you too.


1. Deep Breathing Exercises: Relax Together

Whenever Ming starts to get upset, I sit him down and say, “Ming, let’s have a deep breathing contest and see who can breathe the longest and deepest.” Then, we inhale deeply as if smelling a big bunch of flowers, slowly filling our lungs. Next, we exhale slowly, imagining blowing all our troubles away.

Brain Science Insight:Deep breathing helps cool down the amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for emotional reactions, helping children regain their composure. This practice activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps the body relax.

Practical Steps:

– Find a quiet corner and sit face-to-face with your child.

– Demonstrate the deep breathing process, emphasizing taking it slow.

– Use fun metaphors like “smelling flowers” and “blowing bubbles” to make it easier for the child to understand.

emotional face cards

2.Emotion Rainbow: Identifying and Expressing Feelings

Sometimes kids find it hard to verbalize their feelings, so Ming and I created an “emotion rainbow.” We prepared some colored papers, each representing a different emotion: red for anger, blue for sadness, yellow for happiness, green for calmness, and so on. Every evening, we select a few colors to place on the calendar and talk about these emotions.

Positive Discipline Principle:Positive discipline emphasizes understanding and accepting a child’s emotions. Teaching children to identify and express their feelings is a crucial step in helping them manage their emotions effectively.

Practical Steps:

– Prepare colored papers and glue, and cut them into rainbow shapes with your child.

– Explain the emotions each color represents and encourage your child to choose the colors that match their feelings for the day.

– Spend a few minutes each night discussing the “emotion rainbow,” helping your child recognize and express their emotions.


3. Emotion Journal: Writing a Letter to Feelings

Journaling is a great way to vent emotions. Although Ming can’t write long passages yet, we have our “emotion journal.” Whenever he feels angry, I encourage him to draw or write a few words to express his feelings. Then, we look at these drawings and words together and talk about why he felt that way and what might help him feel better.

Brain Science Insight: Writing and drawing activities can activate the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for planning, decision-making, and emotional regulation. This helps children think more clearly and handle their emotions better.

Practical Steps:

– Provide a simple notebook and some colored pens.

– Let your child draw or write words to record their emotions.

– Regularly review the journal together, helping your child understand their emotional changes.


4. Emotion Role-Playing: Becoming the Emotion King

Kids love role-playing games, which is also a great method for managing emotions. Whenever Ming starts to get angry, I say, “Ming, today you’re the ‘Anger King.’ Show me how the Anger King behaves.” Ming starts imitating different angry behaviors, and then I join in, playing a friend who can help the Anger King calm down. This game not only allows Ming to vent his emotions but also teaches him how to handle them.

Positive Discipline Principle: Role-playing allows children to see issues from different perspectives and learn self-regulation. It also helps them feel understood and accepted, making them more willing to cooperate and communicate.

Practical Steps:

– Set roles with your child, such as “Anger King” and “Calm Friend.”

– Let your child freely express how they act when they’re angry.

– Through role-playing, teach your child calming methods like deep breathing and counting.


5. Gratitude Practice: Finding the Good in Life

Finally, we practice gratitude every day. Each night before bed, Ming and I say three things we’re happy or thankful for. This practice helps Ming focus on the positives in life, making him happier and more peaceful.

Brain Science Insight: Research shows that gratitude practices can increase dopamine and serotonin levels in the brain, neurotransmitters closely related to happiness and emotional stability. By fostering a sense of gratitude, children can face life’s challenges more positively.

Practical Steps:

– Each night before bed, review the day’s positive moments with your child.

– Encourage your child to mention specific things, like “making a delicious cake with mom today.”

– Record these moments in a “gratitude journal” and revisit them regularly.


6. Mindful Movement: Incorporating Physical Activity

Engaging in physical activity is another effective way to manage emotions. Ming and I often do simple yoga poses or go for a walk when he feels overwhelmed. This not only helps him release pent-up energy but also promotes a sense of calm.

Brain Science Insight: Physical activity increases the production of endorphins, which are natural mood lifters. Exercise also reduces the levels of the body’s stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol.

Practical Steps:

– Choose simple yoga poses or activities that your child enjoys.

– Encourage regular movement breaks throughout the day to help your child manage stress.

– Make physical activity a fun and consistent part of your daily routine.


7. Problem-Solving Together: Building Emotional Resilience

When Ming encounters situations that make him angry, we work together to find solutions. We discuss the problem, brainstorm possible solutions, and choose the best one to try. This process helps him feel more in control and less frustrated.

Positive Discipline Principle: Teaching children problem-solving skills empowers them to handle difficult situations constructively. It builds their confidence and resilience, reducing the frequency and intensity of angry outbursts.

Practical Steps:

– Sit down with your child and calmly discuss the problem.

– Encourage your child to brainstorm possible solutions without judgment.

– Help your child choose a solution to try, and discuss the outcome together.


8. Using Feeling Faces: Understanding and Expressing Emotions

To further help Ming understand his emotions, we use the  “Positive Discipline Feeling Faces Chart ”. This chart has various faces depicting different emotions. When Ming is upset, I ask him to point to the face that best represents how he feels. This helps him identify and articulate his emotions.

Positive Discipline Principle: Visual aids like feeling faces help children who struggle with verbal expression to identify and communicate their emotions. This can reduce frustration and improve emotional intelligence.

Practical Steps:

– Print out or create a feeling faces chart with various emotional expressions.

– Teach your child what each face represents.

– Encourage your child to use the chart to express how they feel, especially during emotionally intense moments.

Through these exercises, Ming’s emotions have become more stable, and he has learned how to manage them himself. Whenever he successfully controls his temper and calms down, I feel an immense sense of relief. These methods not only help in managing his anger but also strengthen our bond and understanding.



Navigating the emotional landscape of childhood can be challenging, but with the right tools and understanding, it becomes an opportunity for growth and connection. By incorporating these exercises into your daily routine, you can help your child develop healthier ways to manage their emotions. This journey is not just about reducing tantrums; it’s about building a foundation for emotional intelligence that will benefit your child for a lifetime.

Remember, emotional regulation is a skill that takes time to develop, and your patience and consistency as a parent play a crucial role. Celebrate small victories, and don’t be discouraged by setbacks. Each step forward is a step toward a more emotionally balanced and happier child.

As we navigate these emotional challenges together, I’m reminded of a quote by Fred Rogers: “Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary.”

I hope these strategies can help you and your child bring more laughter and joy into your lives. Together, we can turn emotional challenges into opportunities for deeper understanding and stronger connections





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